{"id":1358,"date":"2011-01-13T11:59:16","date_gmt":"2011-01-13T16:59:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/livinglovingbreathingboys.com\/?p=1358"},"modified":"2011-01-13T11:59:16","modified_gmt":"2011-01-13T16:59:16","slug":"stalled-needing-a-jump-start","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/livinglovingbreathingboys.com\/?p=1358","title":{"rendered":"Stalled… Needing a Jump Start…"},"content":{"rendered":"

I am stalling. <\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>I have the ground beef in the crock pot… made myself lunch and put a load of laundry in. \u00a0Funny, when I awoke this morning, I was so sure I would get the whole house tidied. \u00a0I was sure I would finish and put away the laundry. \u00a0I was sure I would even clean toilets.<\/p>\n

So far… I haven’t done much. \u00a0I am feeling the need to write. \u00a0Or maybe I am feeling the need to make excuses from the work. \u00a0Hum… I am doing a good job.<\/p>\n

This morning while in the grocery store, I bumped into a dad from our school… he was tackling their grocery list too. \u00a0We started chatting…<\/p>\n

“So, will you go back to teaching after all your boys are in school full time?”… this is a question I am asked often.<\/p>\n

How do I explain and not come across as a loser?<\/p>\n

Teaching was a means to an end. \u00a0I needed to have a focus in university. \u00a0Teaching seemed to be my passion at the moment. \u00a0I loved kids. \u00a0I thought of all the times I pretended to play teacher as a kid. \u00a0I was born to be a teacher. \u00a0For the moment.<\/p>\n

Then I married… my true focus in university (I’m honest) and had babies. \u00a0Teaching was now a back up if I had to work… We chose for me to be a stay at home mom. \u00a0Yes, it was hard. \u00a0One paycheck… that had to stretch a long ways. \u00a0Starting a business from scratch… \u00a0all that made those early years challenging. \u00a0Then add 3 babies in 3 years.<\/p>\n

I was in heaven. \u00a0I really was. \u00a0I loved babies, my babies. \u00a0I loved being with them every minute of the day.<\/p>\n

Teaching took a back seat.<\/p>\n

Then I realized that teaching wasn’t a love anymore. \u00a0Oh, I would have done it if I had to… but I was nurturing other interests.<\/p>\n

I was realizing that I didn’t know what I wanted to be when I grew up.<\/p>\n

Now I do, sort of.<\/p>\n

It involves writing, speaking, challenging, encouraging, changing, growing, being.<\/p>\n

I really need to stop worrying about what others think. \u00a0I need to hold on to this time of discovery… finding me.<\/p>\n

I really shouldn’t care if someone understands this journey I am on. \u00a0I mean, really, sometimes I don’t even understand.<\/p>\n

The journey… it’s about self-discovery. \u00a0And then… it’s about being discovered.<\/p>\n

Maybe…<\/p>\n

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I am stalling. I have the ground beef in the crock pot… made myself lunch and put a load of laundry in. \u00a0Funny, when I awoke this morning, I was so sure I would get the whole house tidied. \u00a0I … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/livinglovingbreathingboys.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1358"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/livinglovingbreathingboys.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/livinglovingbreathingboys.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/livinglovingbreathingboys.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/livinglovingbreathingboys.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1358"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/livinglovingbreathingboys.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1358\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1361,"href":"http:\/\/livinglovingbreathingboys.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1358\/revisions\/1361"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/livinglovingbreathingboys.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1358"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/livinglovingbreathingboys.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1358"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/livinglovingbreathingboys.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1358"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}