{"id":850,"date":"2010-01-07T22:55:00","date_gmt":"2010-01-08T03:55:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/livinglovingbreathingboys.com\/?p=850"},"modified":"2010-01-07T22:55:00","modified_gmt":"2010-01-08T03:55:00","slug":"here-i-go-again","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/livinglovingbreathingboys.com\/?p=850","title":{"rendered":"Here I Go… Again."},"content":{"rendered":"
It is 10:01 p.m.  I am nursing a headache.  I seem to have a sinus headache for the past few days.  Maybe I am allergic to the mess that is constantly in my house.<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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Sanj is at the school board meeting.  He just keeps going and going.  I love him.  He is such a sport.<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n
Over the years we have been married, I am always and forever coming up with a new “scheme.”  I am not really trying to get rich …  I realize I was just trying to find me.<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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I have defined myself by being “mom” for so long… and of course that is who I am.  It was who I was … all of me.. for so many years.  I loved being mom.  Yes, I am still mom… but you know what I mean, don’t you?<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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I am mom to six dearly loved boys who still are my world… but they are and continue to take steps away from me for periods of time that force me to seek who I am aside from mom.<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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I didn’t realize how tricky that would be.  Many moms know who they are.  They are nurses, teachers or busy stay at home moms.  <\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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For me, staying at home is no longer fun.  It means that  I am home alone (that is the biggest problem).  It means that all the mess is shouting at me.  It means laundry could possibly be kept under control.  It means groceries and meals could be more organized.  Staying at home means housework.  I have come to the conclusion that isn’t my cup of tea.  Get ME OUTTA HERE!!!<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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So I have been really struggling to find what I am suppose to do… who am I?<\/span><\/span><\/div>\n

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