My kids are scurrying around the house, I can hear Josh attacking his grandpa with an empty wrapping paper role. Sanj is off to the church to practice. My mom and mother-in-law are doing their thing. There is a buzz in the air. It is Christmas! It feel so good this year.
I am not sure why… maybe I am in a very good place emotionally. I have set boundaries for those that needed boundaries set up. I have worked hard at being the best me I can be at this very moment. I feel peace and contentment. I feel like I am home. I have said this before but realize it really isn’t about our house but rather our home.
I always felt a big empty longing especially when I heard “I’ll Be Home for Christmas.” I felt so sad. I know that my family is scattered. But that is just a part of life. My dad has made choices and now lives with those decisions. It is just a fact. I know that God is looking upon him and that he is where he is … It is all good.
My mom is sadder this Christmas… or not herself. But I believe that it is the reality of life… her life. She has to live with her choices too. She has her grandkids and children… and while we are not together… she has each of us… in whatever role, however different we play in her life.
I miss my brother. He will be with his in-laws and family. I wish we did live closer but also know and feel the love that keeps us connected.
It is all how it is suppose to be. And then there is my family. BOY… it has been a good day. BUSY… but good. We baked! I am not a big baker. Jordan and Max were wondering WHY we were baking all of it instead of just buying it? I didn’t have a good answer… except it is Christmas. We are together.
I am looking forward to tonight. Finishing up the few presents left to wrap, watching my husband do the same… (he hates to wrap… but only has mine to wrap… so I don’t have too much sympathy)!
I feel like I have FINALLY come home! I am here with the ones that make me whole.
So… Dear God,
THANK YOU!!! I am so grateful for it all. Thank you for the road that got me to this VERY moment! I feel so FULL!
Thank you for family… all of them. Thank you for my children who make me want to better myself every day. Thank you for Sanj, who is simply a part of me.
Thank you for each of my friends. I wouldn’t be full without them.
Thank you for Jesus… for the REASON for this wonderful SEASON. Thank you for all your blessings.
I ask You to bless each of the people I love … May they be filled with Your peace and love.
Amen.