Jordan’s class is doing speeches. His topic was on Life with 5 Brothers. He did a great job! While I was at the gym today, one of his classmates was there practicing her speech while her mom worked out. I asked her what her topic was and she said “God’s Answers.”
Wow. Kind of a deep topic for a 6 grader. I was intrigued. I was impressed that a 12 year old got it and yet it took me till adulthood to get it.
As a little girl, I prayed for a happy home. I believed that God would answer me. I believed that somehow my father would become a loving dad and we would all be happy. I stopped that pray after I was in high school. It took 30 plus years to see the answer God gave me… Wait… not yet. I already blogged about this so I won’t again. But the answer was in my own family as an adult. And I learn that happiness is relative. (What I consider happy may not be someone else’s happiness).
And so here is God answering me… yet it was an answer of not yet.
Then there are the prayers God says “yes!” I don’t even know of an example because how do I pick? There are so many!
There is the daily answers of health and safety. There are yes answers for helping us find a house that was right for us. There are yes answers to most of my life.
Then there are the No’s. These I struggle with… because sometimes I am not sure that the answer is maybe a not yet.
My biggest one is asking for a girl. Obviously the answer has been no. (And at this point that answer changing to a yes would be *&&^$%&) Obviously I did not want to hear no. Or maybe I was meant to have my six dearly loved sons. But having a NO is not an easy thing to accept.
But just like a child, I want my own way. I think in my wiseness that I know what is best. Ummm as I look through the past at my history… I am so glad that God was/is in control.
After university I broke up with this guy I was sure was IT. I was willing to overlook his MANY flaws because I was sure he was the one. When we broke up, I BEGGED God that if it was His will, to bring us back together.
It gives me shivers to think of life if God had not intervened.
Sanj was there. God was just waiting for the right time. It was perfect timing for both of us. It was perfect because it was God’s timing. I am so glad that I waited.
Yes, No, Not Now… it is the answers we give our children all the time. It embarrasses me to think that I behave just like my children do. I can only image God’s frustration of wanting to show us that He knows best and to just trust Him.
I know that I feel this when my children do the same. As I see it from my perspective as a parent, I am so grateful that God is a God of love and patience.
I am so glad that He is in control… He can even take our bad decisions and bring a blessing out of that!
So as I continue to look for His answers… I hope that I will grow out of my childish behavior and become more accepting of His wisdom and infinite love for me.