We went to church today… (yes, Sanj was on the praise team…) and it was interesting.
I hate letting “bad” thoughts flow through me at any given point. I don’t like being mean or petty. If I am going there, I try to stop the flow of that poison. Sometimes it works, other times, I just have to allow myself that moment and then let it go!
I hate know it all people. OK… hate is a strong word. But I do dislike them immensely.
I don’t mind if you are really knowledgeable but when you try to make others feel less than you (umm, hello…. INSECURITY SCREAMING OUT LOUD)… it is an ugly thing.
So I am there, at church, watching this happen. I am feeling the bad flows of energy whirling around me. CHURCH! I am in church.
It doesn’t make me a good person. But I am bothered by this. Humans… we are all JUST HUMAN. Let it go.
Church… I sat next to a mom I admire greatly. It was great to look around and see wonderful people that I can call my friend and support system.
We talked about the “Sanctuary” and whether church in it self was special… everywhere INCLUDING THE MALL could be a sanctuary. I liked that! Maybe that wasn’t all I was to get out of it but I must admit that my brain froze there … and then it was over. Imagine church in the mall… I would probably go more often. lol
Sanj went to his alumni this weekend… he played and sang on Friday night at the church where his high school was. Despite the fact that this wasn’t my past, it was easy to just go back … songs just took you back…. Side by Side.
As we sat there in the pews, Sanj looked at me and mouthed “I love you.” I love those little moments. They are so meaning in the biggest of ways. High school for so many was not the best of memories for whatever reason.
Being there, I could sense his energy. I am glad that I went, despite the work of getting the kids there, dressed, fed,driving in the storm, keeping them quiet and reminding them that IT WAS NOT ALWAYS ABOUT THEM… we were there for Daddy.
Love is about the little moments. I love watching people interact… it is about the small gestures. One of my friends always calls her husband “My John.” I love that! I love the little things such as carrying a wife’s purse… despite how it will look. Or getting up and starting the car or shoveling the drive… little things.
I love when I see the little things my boys do. Getting out of the car, helping put the groceries in. Sweeping the floor instead of walking over or on it.
Getting up to take the dogs out, doing the dishes with out being asked. Holding my hand on a whim (I LOVE THIS), strumming on the guitar a song they learned. I could keep going… but really I need to focus on the little things that are done and appreciate them. There will always be things they don’t do…
I admire people that go after their dream. My cousin is one of these folks. He has a love for music and just put out a CD… check out his site at www.gkishorecarey.com
This blog is all over the place… it is Sunday. I am avoiding the on-slaughter of Monday morning.
But all good things must come to an end at some point!