Back to the realities of life again. It doesn’t take more than a few seconds to forget that I was ever in vacation mode. For me, a vacation is not having to cook, clean or do laundry. Being off with the boys is busy as usual. Life with them is busy.
I am feeling a bit panicked that school begins in a few more weeks. I think that this summer was the faster yet. I have not yet recovered from the grime of the school year, lunches, homework, this and that. I miss seeing my friends but I am not missing much else.
So much is going through my mind. I have so much I worry about. Sanj thinks that because he doesn’t hear me verbalize my woes or concerns, it doesn’t bother me. WRONG.
I am needing a fairy god-mother right about now. I am feeling the panic of things eating me whole. School hasn’t even started yet. Breathe. In and Out.
It is a hot one today. I am feeling tired. I am back with my oldest for less than 24 hours and already we are combative. I wish him 6 daughters. Yup, I do.
I still have kids that are sick. I wish they would all just get the bug and be done. Yet it is taking its time, one kid at a time. Max is sleeping with a fever. Josh has a major disgusting runny nose which is oozing green stuff out. Ugh.
I hate having sickies. I really hope my mom doesn’t get it. She was in the same room with all of us and usually picks up the littlest bug… and then has a really hard time shaking it off.
I am just writing to write. I have lots to say yet don’t feel like I know how to verbalize it.
I was thinking of how some people are stuck up. How some people feel like they are superior to others. What gives them that idea? I am astonished at how someone can walk around with their nose turned up. I hope flies go up there. I met someone like this. She really bothered me. Rude. Harsh. Her husband was very sweet. Poor man.
I also was fascinated with the world of working moms. In Peterborough, working moms or not, family and children come first, for most. In the bigger cities, where it seem that everyone is trying to keep up with the Jones and Smiths, people seem to actually have children because it is the thing to do. Or maybe because the Jones have 2.5 kids, they need to. Weird. I think that some people look down on a SAHM. What I think is that looking down is because they can’t do it. Not that can’t do it financially, that is not what this is about. They can’t do it… as in they can’t handle it. No one judges you for being a career, why judge someone else who chooses a different path?
I got an email telling me that my nemesis is on a committee with me. I am not sure I can do it. I can get along with most people. I don’t think that I can keep my sanity with a person that follows the book to the letter when it isn’t necessary. I don’t think that I can work with some that has all the “right” opinions and yet does not get their hands dirty. This person has be the bane of my existence as she has made so many people I care about miserable.
Is it a cop-out to quit? It isn’t a committee my heart is is. I could just help as needed. Does that sound pathetic? Sanj thinks I should just say I can’t work with this person. Me or them. I don’t consider myself indispensable… so I know it will go one with or without me. What to do?
I sound like I am in a downer of a mood, don’t I? Hum, wonder if I am?