I had a session with my doctor this week. It is called Life Coaching. I have to admit that I thought it was kind fufuee when I first heard about it. But she is gifted in this. She says it like it is. I left last week telling her I didn’t like her very much. But she calls a apple an apple.
So As we talked and i told her some of the things that I think suck in my life, she said “Soul misery is the worst misery.” Stuff that makes your soul feel yucky. Jealousy is one of those things. As I complained about my childhood and the things I felt robbed off as a child, I realized I was jealous of people that had these easy ideal childhoods. Childhood is long gone, but the ramifications of ones childhood hangs on. I also realized I am jealous of people with truly lucky streaks. You know if you are one of those. I wish I was one of those people that things happened that I wanted or didn’t even know I wanted came my way, easy.
Other things like liking my body… when I look in the mirror, I am often surprised with how I look. In my head I still feel 20 and remember my 20 year old body. Then I look in the mirror and there is more grey hair than yesterday, and even though I didn’t eat carbs the scale doesn’t seem to know that. HELLLLLLOOOO…. where is the me that I know?
What sucks is that when I was 20 and had a body I would kill for now, I didn’t appreciate it. I was STILL conscious of a non existent belly.
Then there is the issues of unfullfilled dreams. Some dreams just aren’t going to happen. It isn’t in the cards. Some sad memories or hurts will never go away. How do I learn to live with it? I do not want to live in the past or live a life of regrets.
Soul Misery. How do you rid yourself of it?
So I am leaving my doctor’s office… and she says, “Wait… here is your homework…”
ERK! Have I told you I hate school???
Read Psalms 139 … I said oh… the one that tells me about being fearfully and wonderfully made?