Just A Bunch of Stuff…

I have so much to say… and as my day goes along I think of things that I want to blog about yet I either forget or by the time I have time to write, it seems kind of petty especially with the events of the world.
Yet I miss writing when I don’t.  So I will apologize for the little things that make up my day yet they make me who I am.

I have been dealing with my boys and their girl friends.  I am learning how hard it is to be a bystander…
knowing in some things that they must find their way.  One of my babes is friends with many a girl.
Yet, I think he has feelings for a friend (or two) in particular.  Every time they make plans to hang out, she cancels.  This has happened more than a few times.  Friday night, he was to go over to her house… (that is another whole blog)…  and her parents apparently knew and were cool with it.  Then all of a sudden, she couldn’t because she was going to her grandparents house.  This is about the 4th time she has cancelled or “stood him up.”  My mom bear claws are coming out.  If she can’t or doesn’t want to … tell him.  I am all about honestly.  It is better to be hurt by the truth then  being hurt twice as much with dishonesty.
My son insists this is a friendship.  They have hockey in common.  He is in town watching one of her games.  Zachary went with him.  I love that he let Zachary go.  Anyway, I am feeling unsure of how to deal with my babes getting hurt.  I can’t put a bandaid on this one, can I?  Yet he seems fine.  Maybe I just know how I would feel.

Sanj is off for 3 days and 2 nights to Toronto for classes.  Sigh.  It is funny because despite the fact that I will have to find a way to get Sammy to classes on time (meaning we have to leave at least a half an hour before the boys normally do), besides knowing I have hockey, guitar and haircuts these days on my own with all of them…  just knowing I am on my own makes me a little more organized.

Weird?  I guess when there are two of you, the expectation is there for help and there is an assumption that it will be easier.  Yet, when it is not easier, that is when annoyance sets in.  Do you know what I mean?

It is all these pressures that I put on myself… such as a yummy, healthy, hot home cooked meal… when Sanj comes home.  When he is gone, I have no trouble just whipping something up… and supper is done.

Friday night (it is always Friday nights), Sanj was behaving badly.  I said, “Do you want a divorce?”  Because I will give you one!”  His reply was “No, then I’d have to have the kids every other weekend.”
lol  I love this crazy husband of mine.  He drives me nuts, yes.

 Yet, I am sure I drive him even nuttier.

I am hoping to get some writing time in this week.  I am not sure what to write.  I have  a book pretty much outlined that I wrote years ago.  I would have to do a lot of tweaking and revamping but the shell is done.  Is it what I want to write about now?  I am not sure.  It would be a book about life with my dad. It would be the story of living and surviving.  I want this book to shout out to parents that are living with abuse thinking it is best to keep the family together.  I want it to be a book that gives the child’s perspective of life in fear.

The other book idea is one of putting my blog into some form of a book.

Do you have thoughts on this?

I am stalling from getting the dishes done, laundry put away and supper.
Hope your week is a good one.
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