NO Feeling Is Final…

Today I was reading this poem by Rilke that my cousin has posted on Facebook as she was remembering a cousin that died too young. 

God speaks to each of us as he makes us,

Then walks with us silently out of the night.
These are the words we dimly hear:
“You, sent out beyond your recall, go to the limits of your longing.
Embody me.
Flare up like flame and make big shadows I can move in.
Let everything happen to you: beauty and terror.
Just keep going. No feeling is final.
Don’t let yourself lose me.
Nearby is the country they call life.
You will know it by its seriousness.
Give me your hand.”
(Rilke)

I am by no means a scholar.  I wish I could be at times, wish I had the discipline and drive to be, yet I am who I am.  Of course, I don’t think that is a bad thing… it is just a fact.

As I was reading this, I could help thinking of the line that  says,”Just keep going.  No feeling is final.”  I am not sure what that is meant to mean but it spoke to me.  No feeling is ever final.  I needed to hear that.  Sometimes I try to work through a situation and deal with emotions that surface.  I just want to be done with the emotions.   Yet when I find those emotions resurfacing, often times I am so disappointed in myself.  It is because maybe I find disappointment in myself for not being “over it.”

I think of my dad.  It is a life of roller coaster of emotions. Yet, when the unpleasant ones surface again, I am so dishearted.  I am frustrated that I have to deal with those emotions again!  No feeling is ever final.

Love is never final, is it?  It is a process.  It is a journey.  I don’t want to be scared to live and love due to fear.  I want to love big, as this is how I love.  I have to accept the fact that I hurt big too.  It must be OK that my feels are on-going.  They are never final.  Feelings for me is what keeps me alive. 

“Just keep going.  No Feeling is Final.”  I like that.