Time Out

The place that I was once fed, socially, emotionally and spiritually is gone.

Things have changed. Or maybe I have changed.

I have my “group” of friends, of course, but this isn’t about friends.

It is more about an environment, a retreat or a sense of belonging.

Really, it is all about my boys. It is their school. It is their happiness that matters.

I was just lucky that I was being fed too.

I have noticed that I have been reclusive, lately. I have been focusing on laundry a bit too much.
I have been making beds, thinking about dinner, maybe just going through a routine that is safe.

This may be normal for most “stay at home” moms but this is not me.

I feel like I am hiding out.

We do not live in town to just have people over. I am not even shopping unnecessarily. (Did I just say that)?

What am I waiting for? I feel like I have pressed the pause button on emotions.

May be it is just winter.

Maybe life really does go on while you are taking a time out.
Maybe I am not indispensable.
Maybe if I don’t call you to lunch, you keep going.

I thought maybe I would be missed.
Maybe it isn’t all about me. Hum… who would have thought?

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