I had a epiphany this week. I had a chance to revisit a bit of my past. I think it was a little gift from God.
I had a conversation with someone from yesteryear that I always wondered how they were. For a short time, they had a piece of my heart.
I always wondered why that relationship was so hard. I used to believe that if you loved someone enough, you could make it all good. I think I also thought if I loved enough for the both of us, it would be OK.
Funny thing is, I never understood why I always felt like I was getting the short end of the stick. In reality, it was because I was. I just didn’t want to see it.
My conversation with this person left me feeling the same way when it was over. I realized after thinking about it that we are such different creatures. I love hard. I am not afraid to love. I love to chat and am never scared to share most of my thoughts. I have a love language that anyone who is with me for a short period can see it. Of course my love language leaves me open to hurt more than I care for.
As I contemplated the conversation, I realized that despite knowing this person over a period of time, I still don’t know what his love language is or was. Is it possible for someone to not have a love language? I don’t know what it is. I realized that with some, you just aren’t compatible.
I was grateful to be able to say I can close that door… and realize that I will never have my questions answered. Maybe that is the answer… that there are no answers. Maybe it really wasn’t about me. (Shock! I thought it is always about me)!
Sigh. Life is so funny and yet despite that, God is so good!