Love, Family and Moments

Posted on 2010-06-01 by Reema
One of the best gifts that my children can get from their aunts and uncles is time.  My boys have a very small circle of family here.  It is pretty much Sanj’s brother, Raj and family (which gives them a boy and girl cousin).  When we go to D.C. there is an abundance of family there.  

This is such a treat for the boys.  They love their uncles and aunts.  They enjoy making up for lost time with the little cousins.  The boys are much older (at least the older 3) then the cousins there. 


We went to the church my brother is pastor at…  there walking in was family.  I loved the smile on the boys faces.  They were just so pleased to see and be with everyone.

Saturday night we were to go out, just the adults.  The older boys looked so sad to be home alone… with the younger ones with nothing to do… especially knowing that we were going to be out with their aunts and uncles.  I decided to let them come.  Of course it was different, having them there but it was so great to see them appreciate the privilege of being able to come out.


There were a lot of smile from the boys this weekend.  Sunday we had a family gathering to celebrate Sanj’s graduation as well as the graduations of his cousin, Tina and her hubby, Raj.
It was just another chance for everyone to hang out and just enjoy being with  each other.

This picture is of all the little ones… well and big ones… the children that make up the craziness of our lives.




It was so special.  Sammy fell asleep at 6 pm and didn’t wake up till the next morning!  Too much loving! lol



There were speeches, tears, laughter and lots of love in the room.  Life happens so quickly and  can be so overwhelming with the hard stuff that it is so important to grab the moments that make it all so special.  That was what this weekend was about for us.  It was great.
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It’s Me… Back At Writing…

Posted on 2010-05-30 by Reema
Did you miss me?  I missed you.  I am not sure why I haven’t blogged in a bit except that life has been really busy and I was left feeling overwhelmed the last few weeks.

We went to Sanj’s graduation, then to DC … all which was great but required me to be organized and in this kind of situation, I tend to set unrealistic expectations for myself and am very upset if I miss that expectation.

It was very neat to be on a University campus again.  It was neat to see Sanj put faces to the names he had been “chatting” with the last years.

The song, “Pomp and Circumstance” always gets me.  It has such memories and symbolism.  It made me want to march down with a cap and gown on me. 

It was special to have all his family there to celebrate.  The boys were great about sitting through the hours of names of graduates. They were tolerate of the pictures afterwards. 

After grad, we followed my brother-in-law’s GPS to eat supper at my happy place… Olive Gardens.   To get to this destination, we drove thorough all rough parts of Philly and saw life in the city.  Sanj kept bugging me to put my window up as scary folks were in very close vicinity to my open window.   It was a brutally hot day, the air in our van was broken and so we travelled in a sauna.  I felt that being pulled out of the van was a chance I was willing to take to keep my window open.  Besides, I had my hubby, who is travelling up the ladder of colors in his belts in Jujitsu.  I knew I was safe with his being beside me.

We were in Maryland, at my brother’s house 3-4 hours later (thanks to traffic).
(I will write more about this in my next blog).

It was a very tiring trip back home.  Hot.  Very Hot. Everyone was very tired.  Being in our own bed felt so good!

We have all the end of the school year stuff to see through.  Being on the fundraising committee at school had me in charge of the Yard Sale.  This is not my thing.  If you read my blogs I have written in the past, you no this.  Ugh.  I hate going through other people’s junk.  I feel dirty rummaging through the junk.  Yet, it was one of those cases that someone had to do it.  I was the one that seemed to be around and so I took it on.  Again it is about the expectation I put on my self.  I wanted so badly to raise a certain amount, (my goal was $1500… we raised $1388.66).  There was so much stuff left and had to be pack again.  There was not enough help.  I don’t think that for the money raised and work involved, that it was worth it.  We will have to visit this discussion in one of our meetings.  I was so proud of my boys.  They were troopers.  The three younger ones woke up at 7 am and went with me and stayed the whole time.  The price paid for this was the junk that they felt were treasures.  Ugh.  lol.

My mom was here and was a great help too.  She is the Queen of Yard Sales.  Wow.  She was in heaven.  I think she shopped and browsed most of that time.  She kept asking me if I wanted this or that.  NOOOOO!   She found  a HUGE suitcase there and was thrilled so she could take back her treasure.  

The quote of the day was, “One man’s junk is just another man’s junk.” This profound statement was made by one of our teachers, Paul Voskamp.

Tuesday, we have a fun morning ahead of us… we are wanting the fine folks in Peterborough and area to see what they are missing by not being part of our school.  We have a morning of fun planned… story time, craft time, snack time, gym time.  It is going to be a great morning!  I am so looking forward to it.  The best part is that it is free!  ðŸ™‚  I have been praying about this day.  I feel it in my bones that it is going to be awesome!  I think we are going to have a big group of kids.  I feel God’s hand in this whole thing.

So, as you can see, life has been busy and not leaving me much time to do the things I really want to do… such as blogging.  My mom has been back and forth between my house and my brother’s.  She will be here till the end of June… to be here for Tyler’s graduation.  While she has been here, the boys have been getting there fill of yummy Indian food.  My mom is a permanent fixture in the kitchen and laundry room while she is here.


This week is going to be a busy one too.  Yet I am going to get back into the habit of writing.  I have missed it.  I have missed your thoughts and comments… I love our special relationship!  ðŸ™‚
 
 If you read this blog, today, come back and check out the pictures, I’ll post tomorrow.




1 Comment

Not Gone

Posted on 2010-05-28 by Reema

Oh Blog,
How I have missed you.  Sanj keeps counting the days as to how long it has been since I last blogged.  Apparently 11 days… and counting.  I have so much to say, as usual, yet time has been a factor.  Then there is the little problem of trying to get the thoughts I have down in a manner that makes sense.  I have had so many things that need to come out and yet it is as if my thoughts are constipated.  Ugh!


So, I am making a list of things that I plan to write this week.
1.  Mother’s Day
2.  Tyler… flying the coop
3.  Sanj and Graduation
4.  The Boy, Family and Love
5.  Degree or Not?
6.  Me… Today
7.  Abused… 70 years old and counting


I may write one blog or write a few… but dear blog, never fear… I am still here… just needing a laxative for my thoughts.


I will be here soon.
Love
Me

Posted in General | 2 Comments

Strange and Wonderful All In One!

Posted on 2010-05-17 by Reema
It’s Monday and boy, let me tell you, my kids are SO ready for summer!!!  It was ridiculous how long it took for everyone to go off to the land of dreams.  My kids are usually  in bed early, compared to most folks.  Josh, 7 p.m., Zach, usually 7:30 is, Max and Jordan 8:30 p.m. latest  and then Sammy and Tyler are in by 9 p.m.  Of course there are exceptions but really this is something I am pretty anal about!  I know my boys need their sleep.  They play hard and so they need to be able to gather their fuel for the next day.

This morning was brutal getting them up.  How many weeks left?  Here’s the thing, the remainder of the weeks are busy one!  Actually, they are VERY busy ones!!!  I think we have something every weekend.  Most of the things scheduled are for the school and a fundraiser of sorts.  Then there is graduation for my sweet Tyler!  Wow… that I am not ready for!  I won’t go there today.  I need to focus.

I am home doing laundry, trying to get most of it done so that packing will be less of an ordeal. I am making a meal for a family that needs a break, of course my turns lands this week.  Hey, if you are going to be busy, why not be extra busy.  Actually, I didn’t realize that this weekend was here so soon.  I thought that I had one week in between.  It’s all good, though.

Thanks for all your comments and helpful suggestions regarding my cramps.  I found them very helpful and plan on looking into something effective before the next attack.

I had an interesting conversation with my mother-in-law last night.  It was just the two of us talking while I was getting supper together.  We ended up talking about funerals.  She was quite free with letting me know some of her wishes.  It was a weird conversation.  I am pretty sure this woman will bury us! lol


I really need to be off and get my mess in order… but before I go, here are some things the boys said to me these last few days.  I blog them to share because to me, they are funny.  I also blog them to remember down the road!


Josh:  “Mommy, you know when Jesus died, they put perfume on him.  How come?”
I respond with a mommy answer.
Josh: “Oh!  Did they put perfume on Michael Jackson too?”
This makes me wonder how his mind works!


Today because I was putter around, I put on jean cut offs and one of Sanj’s tee-shirts.  I picked up the boys, gave them a snack and ran into the grocery store.  As I was walking to the van, apparently this was the conversation that was occurring in the van:


Max:  “Is that Daddy’s tee-shirt Mommy is wearing?  (His brother agreed).  Max: “Well it will be kinda stretchy after Mommy wears it.”  (Making reference to my boob-aciousness)!


Another one of my boys:  Mommy, do you want to know something weird?  My friends think you are cool!  That is so strange!”  

Have I mentioned how much I love my boys?  They are so funny and crazy and smelly and loud and strange and fascinating and rock my world!  How did I ever get to lucky?

Posted in Boys | 1 Comment

A New Week….

Posted on 2010-05-16 by Reema

I have ambitious hopes for today.  It is so beautiful outside!  I feel so happy!  All my worries seem to take a back seat, today!   Last night, Sanj was chatting with Jordan in his room and fell asleep.  4 of the younger boys took advantage of this and found spots on my bed.  Looking around, I love that this spot is where they feel the most loved and cherished.  I didn’t have the heart to move them all, including my husband, back to their own spots, so I nudged Sanj to move and slept in Jordan’s room for the night.

I finished my book I was reading and didn’t get to the movie yet.  I went to pick up my nephew to come play as he was home alone with my in-laws.  They are coming over for supper tonight.  What to make?
I was thinking lasagne (tricky word, I never spell it right), with some homemade bread and top it off with some homemade oatmeal cookies.  Sounds yummy!  I better get of the computer and begin, then!

Sanj and the older two boys went off to the golf club.  We met for lunch and Sanj asked me to notice the clothes my older two were wearing.  lol… they were both dressed in their dad’s golf attire!  Oh dear!  My husband isn’t the best at sharing his things… so we shall see where this lead! lol

I am feeling the pressure of this week to come!
Monday: get caught up with all the laundry, make a meal for someone, try and squeeze haircuts for the boys. I need to take the van in and see what disturbing sound it is making, after the fact the we spent $1500 on it.

Tuesday: should go into the office, try and get the shopping done that is needed for the trip and start to pack that evening. I will have to clean out the van, disinfect it so that Sanj does not catch the Bubonic plague, that he is sure is in the van! lol

Wednesday:  it is the boys dreaded track and field.  To make matters worse, this year it is in Lindsay, which is 45 away.  I usually am there all day to cheer them on and up, dole out monies for snacks and more snacks and hang out with the other moms.  We have company for supper… and then pass on the dogs for the week to this unsuspecting sole!  (God bless him!!!)  Then, it is all the last minute packing.

Thursday:  We leave at noon.  The house sitter comes and so I must make sure it is tidy!  We take off… 12 hours till we reach our destination and counting!

Friday:   we are in Philly somewhere for Sanj’s graduation… how exciting and then… off to DC to spend with all the family.  I am looking forward to spending time with my brother and family.  I am looking forward to kissing all the babies that have popped out over the last year that we haven’t had the pleasure of snuggling with!  ðŸ˜‰

One day at a time, though!  I am off to bake and make a mess!  ðŸ™‚
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Good… It’s Good!

Posted on 2010-05-15 by Reema
A perfect day… waking up without the rush of getting out the door (though I wonder again WHY can my kids not sleep in on the weekend)???  Reading my books and actually relaxing a bit…. then cooking up a storm for company coming…  (I was stressed as I was exposing them to Indian food for the first time… and felt the pressure!!!)… enjoyed the company…  now listening to my men all jamming it out with their dad.  Hey, it actually sounds like heaven here!

Sanj said to me, “Dear, our boys can play… I have more fun playing with them then I do on most praise teams!”

Note to my boys:  That is the ultimate compliment!

I love that this is the new evening relaxation mode.  So Backstreet Boys…  you have nothing over my boys!

In a bit, I am going to watch my movie, “It’s Complicated” and then read some of my book.  It is that perfect reading weather, bit cloudy, breezy and cooler now.

Life is good.  I am so glad that I can feel the love.  There are many times when one of the boys are driving me nuts.  A few hours again, Josh was in his obnoxious form… I could have strangled him!  

Ah… I feel like it is as good as it gets… and there is still one more day to the weekend!  Wahoo!
Hope yours is a good one too! 
xoxo
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What Is The Library?

Posted on 2010-05-14 by Reema
Am I feeling better… better than yesterday.  Today at noon, we had a Spaghetti Lunch, again.  This time it was to raise money for breast cancer awareness and cure.  All the funds raised will go toward our Dragon Boat team.  I was feeling miserable.  My stomach was really bothering me… yet you know, if you continue to listen and do what you know God is telling you to do, He always comes through.  While I only knew of 2 people, other than myself that were coming to help, it turns out that He sent many more hands that made the work much quicker and easier.  ðŸ™‚

I did call my doctor, yesterday in the midst of my distress and tell her that  I can’t not function like this anymore.  There is light at the end of the tunnel.  I know I need to address this now.  Sigh.

I have missed writing so much.  I have so many things to write about… to catch up, if you will.  I hope to do so this weekend.

Last night, my doctor husband was asked to speak at a function at the library about hearing (well, blah blah… if you really want to know specifics, you can ask for a transcript of the evening’s chat).  Despite the fact that my uterus was causing me major grief, I really felt I needed to go and support him.  All the boys were good to stay at home for the evening… except Josh.  He was so upset about me leaving him.  Normally I would leave anyway and know that he would get over it, but he has worked himself up to the point that it would have been stressful for his brothers to deal with him.  So, I, feeling very annoyed and angry at him, took him… in the pouring rain.  He was so good.  He behaved the whole hour and 20 minutes.

My husband is a wealth of knowledge and a nature public speaker… much to my jealousy.  He looked fabulous in his new suit and fashionable in his pink shirt (thanks to me).  Josh was so pleased to see him in a suit that he went up to Sanj and said, “Thank you for wearing your suit!”

Here is the thing, we were in the public library.  I am not sure why but we never really go there.  Actually, I can count the times we have been there on both my hands.  When the older boys were younger, I took them.  We took out books.  Yet, me, being the delinquent that I am, there were always late fees.  It became a little ridiculous.  At some point, I realized that I prefer Chapters (our bookstore) to the library.  I am a snob but I don’t like the smell of old books.  How many dirty fingers have thumbed through it?  Sorry, I know.  Here is the other thing, I HATE when there is a book that I really want to read and the waiting list is longer than Sanj’s toe nails! lol

You get the point, right?  We don’t go to the library very often.  It didn’t bother me until last night, when as we were leaving the library, Josh looks  into the gated, locked library and asks me, “Is this Chapters?”
Sad, isn’t it?  I will make an effort to familiarize the boys with our local library.


Here is Sanj’s comment back… I thought I would add it to the blog for your amusement! 


“A little insight for those of you confused by my wife’s aversion to this literary Mecca. Reema worked at our University Library as an Undergraduate. Reema had to put books back on the shelf. Mostly as I recall, Reema spent most of her time checking out the studious male occupants in the Library through the empty book slots strategically located through the Library. So perhaps without this added incentive Reema may not find the Library as exciting as it once appeared.”

Sanj (formerly studious male student and now husband)









Posted in Boys | 3 Comments

Knock Me OUT!!!

Posted on 2010-05-13 by Reema
I feel as if I was hit by a bus.  Well, actually, if I was hit by a bus, I would likely be knocked out.
I have the curse of a woman AGAIN!  Yup, you heard me.  AGAIN.  Each of the times to many have been extremely painful.

Now I am dealing with it again.  Yet today, I was in such pain I really wanted to be knocked out.  PAIN!  It was like labour pains…8-9 cm dilated.  I seem to be struggling with painful menstrual cramps my whole life.  Back then, I could lay down and sleep it off.

Today as I picked up the boys, I just wailed like a baby.  I was so scared of passing out.  I couldn’t hide my pain.  Every bump hurt.  I get a fever when my cramps get this bad.  I am burning up.  I called my doctor.  I am desperate.  I can’t suffer like this every month and then some.

Tonight my doctor husband is speaking at the library about hearing and stuff.  I really want to go.  I really should go.  Yet… I am not sure I can get out of my bed.

I haven’t written in a while, our internet was down, and then time seems to have run away from me.
I will be back to blogging soon.  I guess this isn’t the blog you would expect to read after my hiatus.
Sorry… I will be writing again… about normal things.  LOL… OK maybe not normal.  It’s me, though!
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My Eulogy…

Posted on 2010-05-05 by Reema

As mentioned, yesterday I went a funeral. It was the funeral of a 80 year old lady, mother to friends of ours.

I sat there listening to this lady’s life and couldn’t help but think of my life.  What would people say of me, when my time comes to lay in a casket?  How would I want my eulogy to be?
Is my life today one that I am proud of?  Do I love those around me enough?  Do my children, husband, family and friends know that my life is as good as it is because they have a place in it?
I want it to be said that I loved my God.  Do I live my live in such a way that it is obvious others know God is my best friend?  I don’t know.  I need to work on that.  My love for God should be something that is shining thorugh me.  It isn’t a secret.
I want it to be said that I loved my boys.   If I died today, will they say that I was the best mom I could be?  Probably not.  I need to work on that.  I need to learn to stop the worries of cooking and cleaning.  I need to learn to just be with them.  I am pretty good at that, I think, but I know I can be better.  Yesterday was a great example of this… Cooking with Jordan was delightful.  Messy? Yes.  Yet memorable… and fun.
I want it to be said that I loved my husband with a passion.  This isn’t hard.  I do love him with all my heart.  He is the best thing that  has happened to me, so loving him isn’t hard.  I need to work on the nagging.  Yet, I do this because I love him! lol
WIll it be said that I was the best daughter and sister?
Will it be said I was a good friend?  I hope so.  I do love my friends.  I love being with them.  I love them as they make my world a happier place.
I am sure I won’t be known for my domenstic skills.  I am sure I won’t be remembered for my love for cooking or cleaning.  I probably won’t be remembered for my knitting!    Maybe I will be remembered for my love for shopping!  Maybe I will be remembered for loving to have a party. 
(Funny story, when we were first married, I thought  I would make Sanj a pair of boxers for Valentines.  I was so excited.  I had a great Home Ec teacher and knew that basics.  I was so pleased with my efforts.  Until Sanj tried it on.  One of his legs couldn’t even make it in the one side! lol This is where the thought really counted!!! )
As I wonder about my eulogy, (not in a morbid way), I hope that the life I am living is one that is pleasing to God.  I have things that I need to work on. It is something that I plan to make a conscious effect. 
Have you ever thought of what kind of legacy you will leave behind?
3 Comments

Jesus LOVES me!

Posted on 2010-05-04 by Reema

Today I went to a funeral… I will write more about this later but they read 1Corinthians 13.  Like you, I have heard it so many times and had to memorize it.  


For some reason, today I got it.  It is a guide to loving.  I am sorry if I am stating the obvious… but I realized that if  we followed it.. we would have happier marriages, friendships and relationships in general.


If I have everything, but do not know how to love, I am nothing.  Have you heard a gong or the clash of cymbals?


If I give money to the beggar lady, feed the poor, have faith as big as mountain yet do not have love, what is the point?


Love IS patient.
Love IS kind.
Love DOES NOT envy.
Love DOES NOT boast.
Love IS NOT proud.
Love IS NOT rude.
Love IS NOT self-seeking.
Love IS NOT easy to anger.  (Hum).
Love forgives.
Love seeks truth.
Love protects.
Love always trusts.
Love always hope.  It does not give up.
Faith, hope and love… the greatest is LOVE.



I wish I could say this all comes so easy to me.  I wish I was kind all the time.  I wish I was patient all the time.  I wish I was not easy to anger.  I wish forgiving everyone was so easy. I wish I did not lose faith.  

I am so glad that God is so patient with me.  I am so glad that God believes in me even when I don’t believe in myself.  I am so glad that God is so forgiving.  I am so glad that God loves me!  You know, GOD… King of kings, Lord of lords, Saviour, HE LOVES ME!!!

I love that!  Oh, by the way, HE loves you too!  I’d like to think that He loves me a little more… lol but there I go being all about me.
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Caution!

Posted on 2010-05-04 by Reema
It is getting hard to get up in the mornings.  The boys seem to have a hard time settling at night as the sun still shines and the weather  beckons them to stay outside longer.  I had to encourage them that we are in the home stretch.  About 7 and half weeks left till the school year is over.  We can do it, yes, we can!
I am in the office today, though I was suppose to be in JK with Josh.  You know what they say, when it rains, it pours.  Despite having 3 office staff that are there to cover each other, all three had family stuff that left me needing to go in and cover.  I don’t mind, but I did miss going into JK. 
Today on the radio, I heard that a mom was backing out  of her drive way and hit her little 2 year old.  Can you imagine?  How horrid.  My friend was backing up at the high school yesterday and paused as a bunch of high schoolers walked by.  She proceeded to back up and felt herself hit something or rather, someone.  One of the kids had bent down to do whatever and was out of sight.  Please be careful … backing up.  Please!  Did you know it is the second most common cause of death at home?


Another helpful tip, if you have a newer vehicle that comes with the camera that comes on when you reverse, don’t trust it 100%!


A funny little story… OK, it wasn’t really funny but what my husband confidence is what made it funny.  A few years ago, Sanj bought a Denali.  I have often mentioned that this piece of metal is his one true love.  He loves his truck!  He brought it home with such confidence  in its abilities.


Our last house had a circular drive.  The middle part was a grassy, mossy area with trees.  It was winter.  We had company.  Sanj had come home after our company had come.  They had parked in his spot.  (Remember my many blogs that talk about my sweetie and how he is a creature of habit)?  Feeling powerful in his 4 wheel machine, he parked the truck in the middle, where there was a lot of snow.  He was sure that the beast could drive right out of there.


The next morning, at an obscene hour, I heard this noise outside the window.  It wasn’t minutes after 5 a.m.  I could hear this loud racket.  Revving… more revving and then silence.  As I dragged myself out of bed, I seen Sanj throwing his gloves down and he is MAD!!!  I was scared.  What happened in the night?  Did someone break in and damage the vehicles?


This part is only funny because of my husband’s deep love his hunk of metal and his confidence in its abilities.  Apparently, he had decided to move the truck, no doubt bothered that it was not in its usual spot.  As he tried to get out of his spot, he was in snow much deeper than he realized.  Thus the revving.  Again… trusting the machine, he was watching the camera that was to guide his view of the rear.  Before he knew it, he heard a crunch!  He hit a tree.  The camera was covered by snow.  Oops!  $3000 lesson that gadgets are only that.  


We can all laugh at this now simply because the only thing that was hurt was the truck and my hubby’s pride.  


How horrid it would be to hurt someone we love.


Caution and then more caution…
Use caution and then some.



 
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Cooking 101

Posted on 2010-05-04 by Reema


I am so weary!!!  I have been cooking with my 6th grader.  It is part of his homework and it is also part of my TO DO list with the boys.  I want each of them to be able to cook a meal… that they can rotate making on a Sunday evening.  I really want them to be great cooks and know their way around the kitchen… as well as they laundry room and understand the in and out of cleaning.  I am not asking to much am I?

Cooking is great.  It is fun and I was impressed with Jordan’s ability the dice a onion.  Who needs a Slap Chop when one has a Jordan?  We made a meal together for friends of ours who lost their mom/grandma.  It is a recipe that we have never had but figured it to be family friendly and healthy.  Add some bread and a salad and we have a dinner.  We doubled the recipe to make one for his principal. lol

Here’s what we made… 


CHICKEN, BROCCOLI AND GARLIC PASTA CASSEROLE
Printed from COOKS.COM

3 oz. cooked penne (we used whole wheat)
Salt and pepper
3 c. steamed, chopped broccoli
2 1/2 tbsp. butter
1 c. chopped onion
2 cloves chopped garlic
3 tbsp. flour
1 tsp. dried thyme
1 1/2 c. chicken broth
1 1/2 c. whole milk
1 bay leaf
3/4 lb. chicken breast tenders (strips)
Pinch nutmeg
2 tbsp. chopped parsley
1/2 c. cottage cheese
3 tbsp. Parmesan cheese

In large bowl put cooked pasta and broccoli. Heat oven to 350 degrees. In a sauce pan, heat the butter over medium heat. Add onion and cook for about 3 minutes until softened. Stir in garlic and flour; cook for 1 minute. Stir in thyme and then slowly whisk in the broth and milk. Add bay leaf, bring to boil, reduce heat and cook gently for 10 minutes. Add chicken and cook for 2 to 3 minutes until chicken is barely cooked through. Remove from heat and season with salt and pepper and nutmeg. Add to the bowl with the pasta and broccoli along with parsley and stir until mixed. Put casserole into oiled 11 1/2 x 8 inch baking dish. Dot with cottage cheese and sprinkle with Parmesan. Bake for about 20 minutes until heated through and the top is lightly browned.


We made three different casseroles.  One was for Sanj that we improvised.  My feet hurt and my kitchen is a mess.  Cleaning up is part of the work, isn’t.

Tyler is doing laundry and Sammy is on dishes.  You would think I shouldn’t  be this tired!   Don’t forget that I still have Josh!  We were watching the news that was talking about a take down that their uncle was a part of.  I guess Josh was holding his pee till the very last minute.  Well as I was trying to help him with his pants… I see this look and then see his pants getting wet.  This child….  $%^&#&!!!   He says to me, “When you are mad at me, you don’t talk to me very nice.”  Hum… I’ll work on that … 


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All In A Day…

Posted on 2010-05-03 by Reema

Highlights of my day:


The boys had a PD day… no school.  Though Josh doesn’t seem to understand the meaning of sleeping in, it was delightful to lounge in bed for a bit.  It was so nice to not have to rush off.  Josh had a birthday party.  He was so annoyed that Jordan was invited too!   Jordan was invited to keep his friend, the older brother, company).  Josh was so upset!!!  Yet, he came home absolutely delighted that Jordan had played with him and was the best big brother ever!


Tonight, at supper, we had parmesan crusted baked chicken, rice and beans and a platter of raw veggies.  I am nagging the boys to eat their 5 veggies.  Then, they all looked at me as if I had lost my head as I berated Josh for eating too many veggies!  He actually got in trouble for eating too many veggies! Crazy boy!  Yet his system of not impressed with his love for all things orange, green and red!  Who gets their kid in trouble for eating to healthy?  Wish that was my problem!!!


As I was getting Josh ready for bed, I called him a “Dude.  He looked offended.  “Hey, don’t call me a pimple on a donkey’s butt.”  Huh?  Apparently Tyler told him that was the meaning of dude.


Sanj and the boys have been jamming together every evening.  This Friday they are going to be playing for Vespers, the Friday night program for Sanj’s alumni.  They sound so beautiful together.  I am sure God is just smiling down.  A little heaven on earth.


We did a little shopping today too, for underwear and shoes for some of the boys.  Zachary’s foot keeps turning inward, pigeon toe, I think is what they call it.  I am going to have to get it looked at, though the information on-line seems to say there isn’t much one can do.  We shall see.  As Zach took his shoes off to try the new shoes, he was barefoot.  Not sure why, but he didn’t bother with socks.  Wow… his shoes were so disgusting!  The smell!!!  It really should have been illegal!


While we were killing time to pick up Sammy from school, I took the boys to a nearby park.  Tyler had to pee.  I told him to find a bush.  Next thing I knew, as I looked up, there was my Tyler peeing in the middle of the park!!!  Hello!  Boys will be boys.  Unfortunately I wasn’t quick enough with my camera!


My day… in no particular order.  I love my boys.  I love my husband.  I love a day off!

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Oh Husband, Where Are You???

Posted on 2010-05-03 by Reema
Yesterday, after church, I asked Sanj to run to the store to pick up some construction paper that Sammy needed for a project. I was going to take all the boys home and begin lunch. After the boys and I had eaten lunch, I looked at the time. 1:30 p.m. I wasn’t really worried, as I figured that since Sanj was alone, he may have run into Home Depot or did an errand and probably saw someone and lost track of the time.

At 2:30 p.m. as I was laying down with Josh… I started to worry. I could see that Tyler and Zachary were getting anxious too. It had been 2 hours later. Sanj hates shopping so I could not imagine him wandering the stores. I begin to have visions of him in a car accident. I wondered what the first step would be to find him? I gave him 15 more minutes before I was going to call my brother-in-law… the cop. I know he would help me. Yet, knowing that everything was likely OK, I didn’t want to overact.

Just as I was getting ready to call Raj, I heard Sanj’s car pulling in. I was so mad. He didn’t have his cell phone with him. I could hear Tyler and Zachary scolding him. He makes his way upstairs, sheepishly.

Have you ever been so mad and relieved all at the same time? Phew! I wouldn’t have to sell the house or find an audiologist or look for caskets or understand or insurance policies. Yet, I still wanted to hurt him bad!

He had gone to the music store, it was closed. Then he went to the men’s store and got carried away chatting with the guy and buying a suit. Hum… He better look darn fine in that suit!!!

It is one of my biggest peeves about my husband. I hate that he never has his cell when he should or it isn’t charged or on!!! Grrr…

I also hate that he never worries about me. When I am off at night to a meeting or the movies, all the lights are off and he is sound and snoring! What if I was in an accident? He wouldn’t even know till he woke up at 5 a.m. Maybe I should stay out one night and not come home and let him actually have that moment of panic and wonder what life is going to be like as a single dad.
Hum… I like that idea. Movie anyone? lol
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How Great Is Our God

Posted on 2010-05-02 by Reema

Today at church, I was moved by the trails of those that I care about are going through. This song by Chris Tomlin was sung. I was overwhelmed by the deep faith that I saw in those whose trials where so huge in comparison to mine. Behind my sat a lady, fighting breast cancer. Soon she will be going in to start her chemotherpy. Her children sat beside her, singing this song. Then I saw another friend, crying, having lost loved ones this week. As I sat in church, my friends were by the bedside of their mom, waiting for her to take her last breath.

As I sat there, thinking of my burdens, they seems so small in comparison. I so often think of the story of Job. I am not sure I would have had that kind of faith. I get so frustrated and mad. I admired those around me that have that kind of faith. I used to have. I am working at growing my mustard seed of faith. Church today, I heard a sermon, yet it was one that was totally different than the one the preacher was giving.

I am grateful for all the blessing in my life. I am so grateful. Those blessings include my beautiful family, who inspire me everyday to be the best that I can be. Those blessings included a cup that overflows with friends near and far, who I love so much. Those blessings include my community, church and school. I could keep going but I know you understand that God is so good.

When the valleys come my way… again… I really hope and I can sing this song, hands held high and KNOW that God is so GREAT and Worthy of Praise…. even when I am in the valley!

Dear Jesus,
Today, I pray for my friends, You know, those that are in those dark valleys… please Lord, give them courage, strength and hope. May they feel Your love surrounding them. How I love you. Thank you for being the God that is SO GREAT!
Amen

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Dr. Sanjeev Sukumaran

Posted on 2010-04-30 by Reema
Tonight my very own Doctor and I are going out with some friends to a yummy steak house.  

Yes, my sweet, super smart hubby is now officially a Doctor of Audiology…   I am so proud of him.  He was really stressed out  this afternoon as he waited the results.  I thought about distracting him by telling him I was pregnant for the afternoon! lol  Yet, just the thought sent me into a panic.

This afternoon, I had an appointment with my doctor.  It was scheduled for longer than usually.  I, being me, crazy and all, had this moment, thinking, “What if I am pregnant and she is calling me into her office to break it to me, knowing I would need to be admitted into the Nichols Building (our department that is for those who need psychological help).

Crazy, I know.  Yet as I was walking the mall the other day, there was this little itsy bitsy babe… all brand new and beautiful.  Oh my goodness, I miss that beautiful time.  I miss how their cute little bum could fit in my palm.  I miss that special smell of a new babe.   I miss those little sounds.  I miss all those little things.

Oh well.  Now I have 3-4 of the boys that can buy their clothes from the men’s section.  Ridiculous!

My Baby #2 will be off to high school in just a few months.  How is that possible?  My little Tyler,  cried for 6 weeks straight about leaving me as he went to JK.  Can you tell I am still traumatized?  Life was so hard for him.  Change was (is) hard for him.  He loves consistency… routine.  Soon he will be leaving all that has been familiar for the last 10 years and off to a whole new world.  I know he will be fine.  Not sure if I will be.  Sigh.  He is such a wonderful boy with a great big heart.   I love this kid of mine.  Yes, I love all of you… Sammy, Jordan, Max, Zach and Josh!  Wow… that is a lot of love to pass around!  No wonder I am tired! lol

It is so gorgeous outside!  Sunny, bright, warm!  It is supposed to rain some on the weekend.  The boys are part of a floor hockey tournament to raise money for their mission trip, Sammy and Tyler will be going this summer.  5 of my boys are playing… X that by $10… I can pay for a few trips… at this rate!  ðŸ™‚

Josh and Sanj will be hanging out for the day.  I have to admit that I hope Josh poops in his pants at least once for Sanj!  I also hope it is the kind of poop that is so loose it has run down his legs.  To make it the best experience yet, I hope Josh doesn’t tell him till the poop is dried up and crusty.  ðŸ™‚  I only hope this for Sanj, so he will know what he missed out on while he was studying.  Why is Josh pooping in his pants?  I dunno.  He has this diet that is too healthy, I am thinking.  So, often he doesn’t make it to the bathroom.  We are working on him.  I am hoping to feed him full of junk to back him up a bit! lol

I am feeling my vibe coming back!  It feels so good to write again.  For those of you that take the time to read my rambling… thank you.  You flatter me!

Happy Weekend!


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Babbling….

Posted on 2010-04-30 by Reema
I have a bit of writer’s block.  It leaves me feeling frustrated and discontent. I am in a funk where so many things I usually do, I haven’t done in a while.  Last night, I had cleared everything and everyone out of my way so I could watch Grey’s Anatomy. Yet, I chose to putter in my room doing this and that.  Sanj came home and we chatted instead and then went to bed. (Of course this is better than Grey’s, lol, but it is not like me).
Today, a little while ago, my husband finished writing his comprehensive exam. Now he is pacing.  I thought he would be relieved.  Yet,now he has to stress about whether he passed.  Of course he does not have the confidence in himself that I do.  I am sure he passed.
The other day, I walked into Sanj office where he was suppose to be studing. He was online looking at backhoes and tractors.  I felt a moment of panic. Why in the world was he looking at $30,000 toys that we don’t need?  I could think of a lot of things to do with $30,000!  Forgot the fact that I need a new kitchen (because I hate the one that we have). I would put in a pool with beautiful  stonework around it. Ok, that would cost way over $30,000… but think of all the pool parties we could have? While speaking of toys we don’t need but would love, I would a RV to travel around with.  How much fun would that be?
When I asked Sanj what he was doing, he said,”You never know when you may need a backhoe?” Hum…you never know when you may need an  extra head, either!
I am hoping that next summer I can take the boys on a RV  adventure to the East Coast of Canada.  How much fun would that be? Maybe it is just a dream… but why not dream big? 🙂  This is something I have always wanted to do. Apparently they, the RVs are very expensive to rent. Anyone have one you need driven?  Let me know! 🙂
I am in the office today as all the usually staff had family emergencies.  Isn’t that usually how it works?  I am here, answering phones and taking messages for all the  others to return since I no not the answers. There is a  LOT of white noise in this office. I feel like I am going to need a hearing aid, myself.  I did do some real work for a few hours. Sanj left with his buddy, who was overseeing his test, I guess to make sure he didn’t cheat. I said I would man the office while he stepped out. Here’s the thing, I am usually never in the office allow.  Sanj is always around. He ususally pops his head around the corner to see he walked in.   I am sitting here, the door opens, and I feel a moment of panic. What if this is a crazy person? I am unarmed and helpless. I look around to where they keep the panic button…all the while smiling and asking what I can do to help them?  How long would it take for the police to come?  I am tempted to press it and see how it all plays out… a trial run, if you will.  I would likely get fired,again.
Sigh.  At least blogging is taking my mind of the fact that I am alone.  Unless  I am reading, I really don’t like being totally alone. Sad, isn’t it?  I much rather be in a room, snuggling  with a warm body, reading.
Boring, is it?  I am sorry. I am really suffering from writer’s block.   Yet,  I figured as long as I type, if a crazy comes in,  I can leave you a clue as to what happened! lol Maybe I am the only crazy around here.  Oops, here comes someone… 2 men,  olderish, with hearing aids…
Gotta run…
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Bit of This and Bits of That…

Posted on 2010-04-27 by Reema
I have begun so many blogs over the last days.  Yet none have made the PUBLISH POST button.  Now I am overwhelmed by all my thoughts!   So I am just going to write…

* Last week was a busy week of preparing for the Rhema Dinner/Auction.  Lots of work and yet the result was an amazing evening with lots of money raised to help families at our school who may not otherwise be able to be there.  $20,000 + was raised!  How awesome, isn’t it?

* I had so much fun that night as a participate of the auction.  Sanj told me that I could bid on one big thing.  Oh my goodness… the whole adventure of bidding was so exciting!  Annoyingly, there was a few others in the crowd that loved raising the bid.  Yet in the end… I Won!  ðŸ™‚  (Yes, Sanj, I know, we didn’t win really because we had to pay for it)!  We won an evening out chaffuered by our former and present principals in a limo to a yummy steak house.

*My mom was here and we were blessed with yummy food for the week.  Now it is back to the reality of cooking and cleaning alone.  The boys were surprised to have her fish curry tonight for supper that she made before she left and had hid from them.  ðŸ™‚

*This weekend we went into Toronto with the boys.  We had a bunch of stuff to take care of at the Mac Store.  My laptop, the MacAir (which I love) had fallen apart.  It has dents and bruises where a laptop should not have any.  This was due to my lax in judgement of letting Josh use it.  Apparently he bumped it and dropped it one too many times.  It was literally apart at the hinges.  Since we were going to the store, I decided to put away my pride and ask if it can be salvaged.  Guess what?  The hinges were a problem and so they covered it under warrenty!  ðŸ™‚  I had the whole screen part replaced… free!  It looks like a whole new computer!  I was so pleased!  This is never usually our luck!

Then… I have been HINTING LOUDING that I needed a new laptop.  As much as I love the Air, it is really not much of a heavy weight when it comes to storage and speed.  I kept telling Sanj that I needed a new laptop in order to begin writing my book.  I even stooped as low as gettting Josh to tell his dad (who Sanj can NOT say no to… at all) that his mom needed a new one!  As I was dealing with the Mac Genius with our issues… my sweet, dear, loves me to death husband got me a new Mac Pro!  Yes, I am spoiled!
Wow, the thing is fast!  Heavy and ready for me to write!

Last but not least, Sammy’s iPhone was having issues. The first Mac genius was not a genius but rather a lazy one.  He said it was done for.  Sammy was so upset.  We were upset.  When I asked my genius for a second option, he did not agree with the guy.  Yet this meant another appointment.  Sanj went to TO on business today and stopped in to pick up my laptop.  As he had them look at the phone, they decided that since it was just shy of the warranty, they would just replace it!  A new phone!    As I said, this kind of thing never happens to us.  Thank you, Jesus!

*I had to take in our stuff to get our passports done.  $302 dollars later, plus a $100 for the pictures… we are free to travel for another 5 years.  The guy that helped me was a dud.  He must have been a 20 something guy with absolutely no personality.  None.  I was with him for half an over… you’d think he might have made small talk or cracked a little smile… especially as he looked at my adorable boys…  but nope, nothing.  I felt bad for him.  Must be rough to sit there, day in and day out with a cushy government job, great benefits, all sorts of fake holidays off.  Personality should really be a requirement, don’t you think?

*Have you ever looked into your kid’s eyes, listen as they say they love you and melt?  I am not an overly emotional mom.  I, more often then not, want to just say, “Suck it up,” after they have gotten hurt and there is no evidence of the boo-boo.  Yet, I know a bandaid and kiss make it all better.  I am not the kind that gets too teary at events.  Yet, Sunday as we were driving to TO, one of the boys looked at me and said, “I love you, Mommy.”  I felt myself get teary and feel so overwhelmed at the gift of being each of the precious, crazy boys mother.  I felt so blessed to be on the receieving end of their unconditional love.  It doesn’t matter how crazy I am, they love me.  Wow.  I need to really stop more often and enjoy the gift that is mine.

*My last thought for this blog is a sympathy note to my husband.  Sanj loves his clothes.  He has expensive taste.  One of his favorite designers is Hugo Boss.  This weekend, Tyler comes over to Sanj and says, “Daddy, look!”  My 13 year old fit perfectly into one of his dad’s Hugo Boss sweaters.  I think I heard Sanj cry. lol
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Tick Tock…

Posted on 2010-04-22 by Reema

This week is one of those weeks that is so busy.  Everything that can happen seems to be occurring this week.  Our dinner/auction is tomorrow.  I am really looking forward to it.  Yet I am dreading the before and after.  It is all good, though.


I love auctions!  Sanj hates me loving them! lol  I get so carried away with the auctioneer’s voice, it is almost hypnotizing.  As someone out bids me, I feel the irritation of being out done!  It is almost impulse as my hand goes up again.  At this point, Sanj is looking at me, disturbed.  “No more,” he is telling me.  I just smile.  ðŸ™‚  There is such a victory when that item that is desired is finally on my tally sheet.  I usually look at Sanj, absolutely delighted, saying, “I won!!!”   He looks at me and says, “You didn’t win it!  We have to pay for it.”


There is the never-ending question looming around me of what to wear?  I find this really cute dress… that would be even cuter with some heels.  I tried on some heels and felt myself teetering  in them.  As I righted myself upright, I caught the eye of the salesman.  I wanted to stick my tongue out at him.  I wanted him to try parading around in ridiculous heels.  I used to wear heels in another life.  How did I do it and what happened?  THE BOYS!!!  Back to square one.


It is all good though.  I have been doing good with my quest for self control were food goes.  Yes, I am trying again.  Hey, at least I don’t give up!  ðŸ™‚  Anyway, I am trying to eat to fuel my body and not to eat when my emotions are all helter skelter.   It is amazing to me how little I really need to eat or shall I say how horrifying at the amount of junk I would indulging in.


Tick Tock… my time is up.  I really can’t put off beginning my day…
I hope your is a good one!

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One Out Of Every Six…

Posted on 2010-04-19 by Reema
Did you know that 1 in 6 women are raped?  Did you know that most women know their rapist?  Did you know that 10% of girls that go away to university, will be victims of rape their first year?  Did you know that only 1 in 6  rape victims will report it?

Why am I writing this?  I have been thinking of it for a long time.  I was a victim of rape.  I am a survivor.  Everyone has a story.  Mine is not that different.  

Did I know him? Yes.

  
Did I trust him?  Most Definitely.

Was I vulnerable? Yes.

Who was he?  He was a teacher and pastor.

What was I doing?  Babysitting.
Did I report it?  Not to the police.  I wished later that I had.  I did eventually report it to the people that were in charge of his employment.  
What happened?  Not much.  Sure, he was “let go.”  The funny thing is that these people, the principal… gave him a recommendation.  The church turned their heads.  When asked if they (the conference that he was hired under) knew of this, it was denied.  Hum.

Where is he now?  Back dealing with the vulnerable… back in the church, preaching.

Was I the only one?  Nope.

Often over the years, I  have thought back to this time in my life.  I think of those that did stand up with me, especially when I couldn’t stand on my own.  I think of my rapist and wonder if he will ever be remorseful?  I think of the people in charge, who could have and should have done something.  I feel anger towards them the most.

Sanj called my rapist a wolf in sheep’s clothing.  It is the perfect description of him.  Charismatic, engaging and knew how to get you hooked onto God.  Yet… there was another whole side.  I am so sad that I fell for the act.  

What makes me write this?  I have felt the need to write about this for a long time.  I have written about this under a pseudonym.

Yet as the years have gone by, there are so many with the same story as mine.  Just a little different backdrop yet the shock, horror, fear, disbelief, anger, sadness … all are there for each of us.

I talked to someone who never shared it with anyone.  She is my age.  Wow.  I can’t image holding that in.  Actually, it is the worst thing to do.  It is not your fault.  It can’t be.  No… means N O!  Stop… means S T O P!  Don’t means DO NOT!!!

So I write this to say… you are not alone.  You are one of many, many women.  It is something that we need to speak out about.  We are not the ones that should be embarrassed.  We are the ones that need to speak out.   This is where my issues with church lie.  Why are they protecting each other?  What if it was their daughter?  Would they still have each other’s back?  What if these people were to experience rape?  Would churches still hire these criminals then?
OK… I have issues.  Yet most of it is stuff that I have had to let God deal with .  Justice is His and only His.  I have to be content that I do my part.  Part of that is to take a stand.  I want to be able to say loud and clear that I am have been a victim.  I am nobody’s victim now. That is where it stops.  
As a mom of 6 sons, this is something that has shouted out to me.  I am in charge of teaching 6 soon to be men that woman deserve utmost respect.  Women are a gift from God.  Eve was a gift to Adam.  They are to be loved, cherished and respected.  They are to understand and listen.  No means NO! Stop mean STOP!  Don’t means DO NOT!
This is such an important blog to me.  I waited forever to write it.  I wanted it to be right.  I want this, my story, to make a difference.  SO… I want to write and say, if you, too, have been a victim of rape, you are not alone.  Don’t be alone.  Find a friend.  Share.  Pay a therapist.  They have to keep the information confidential.  Write in anonyomously.  Please just don’t keep your pain and sadness locked in.  It isn’t healthy or worth it.  Sharing  your pain is part of healing.


I am talking about rape.  Yet, there are so many other terms that simply mean violation.  If you are sexually touched in any way that was not wanted… it is a crime.  It is wrong.  Your body is yours.  No one has a right to any part of it.
1 out of 6 women are raped.  That do not mean that each of those 6 women must stay a victim.  It is in our power to change that!  Be that survivor! 
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